Discussion Forum > Suppose I don't do anything
Alan Baljeu:
I rather like the title "Get Nothing Done".
When I was coaching, I used to invite badly disorganised people to teach me how to be as disorganised as they were. That really helped to open their eyes to what they were doing.
I rather like the title "Get Nothing Done".
When I was coaching, I used to invite badly disorganised people to teach me how to be as disorganised as they were. That really helped to open their eyes to what they were doing.
January 22, 2021 at 10:45 |
Mark Forster
Mark Forster
I do think that the idea of "embracing our fears" in some sense, especially in the way that 'the question" does it is worth doing. I also like how you used the question at different levels of focus and clarity to help drive clarity further down the abstractive tower: if you don't have strong resistance at one level, you can bump it up until you do meet resistance, and then you'll be able to drill down further after that to have some more clarity. I think that's a powerful technique.
I also think, though, that there is some worth in actually trying to learn to "get" the question in the format that Mark puts it. It's like training a muscle, and for me, I find that such "sensitivity" exercises for getting in touch with my real thoughts and feelings are worthwhile. I find that this is a big limitation I currently have, and whenever I can conquer that, it's wonderful. I've used this question laboriously in a few situations where I'm struggling to make a choice, and it takes a while, but finally I'm able to figure out which one I'm really resisting not doing, but often that's because it takes time to unpack layers of analysis to get at the true, intuitive feeling that is more accurate, especially when so many options might be "equally good."
I also think, though, that there is some worth in actually trying to learn to "get" the question in the format that Mark puts it. It's like training a muscle, and for me, I find that such "sensitivity" exercises for getting in touch with my real thoughts and feelings are worthwhile. I find that this is a big limitation I currently have, and whenever I can conquer that, it's wonderful. I've used this question laboriously in a few situations where I'm struggling to make a choice, and it takes a while, but finally I'm able to figure out which one I'm really resisting not doing, but often that's because it takes time to unpack layers of analysis to get at the true, intuitive feeling that is more accurate, especially when so many options might be "equally good."
January 22, 2021 at 15:21 |
Aaron Hsu
Aaron Hsu
I was wrestling with the question, "What am I resisting not doing?". Sometimes I see a thing and it immediately jumps out as something I don't want to neglect. But sometimes I get confused by the question and get lost what exactly I'm aiming at.
In an attempt to untangle my thoughts, I separated the not doing from the resisting, and came up with "Suppose I don't do [this thing]?" Now this is an evocative question. If my mind resists that outcome, then I likely should do [this thing]. The scope of question was readily expanded, and lead to big personal insights.
- Suppose I don't put in a full day's work with my job (which is optional for me)? My intuition doesn't object.
- Suppose I don't ever develop a passion for my work? Strong resistance! Developing passion suddenly becomes a priority.
- Suppose I don't push forward with this personal project? Strongly resisted. I guess I better get into it.
- Suppose I don't eat that last slice of pizza. That's okay.
Then I mused on the universal:
- Suppose I don't do anything?
Instantly feeling that is a bad idea. I better find something to do. But it's interesting such a broad question works so sharply. Suppose I don't" question feels like a very powerful piece of reverse psychology. I am imagining Mark could rename this site "Get Nothing Done", because the minute you ponder such a title, your reaction is to invert this, and zero in on what needs to be done.
I mean this all as aiming in the same direction as "What am I resisting not doing". Maybe it can substitute, or maybe it's just a help to engage the same question.