A New Question for FVP, Simple Scanning and Life in General
Sunday, January 17, 2021 at 16:22 When I was very young, back in the early fifties, before the advent of domestic central heating, I lost count of the number of times I put my homework off for hour after hour until I ended up having to wake myself up to do it at 6 a.m. on a freezing cold morning.
I think the memory of those cold mornings, and the knowledge that it was entirely my own fault that I got myself into that mess, sparked a life-time interest in time management. But it wasn’t until nearly seventy years later that I finally realised WHY I kept getting myself into this easily avoidable situation.
The completely obvious reason, which had eluded me for so long, was that I was paying more attention to my resistance to starting my homework than to my resistance to doing my homework in a freezing unheated bedroom at 6 o’clock in the morning.
In other words I was paying more attention to how I felt about doing it than to how I felt about the consequences of not doing it.
Or to put it yet another way I was resisting doing it, rather than resisting not doing it.
I was ignoring the negative consequences.
I realised that there are two types of motivator - 1) the positive motivator of succeeding at what you have set out to do, and 2) the negative motivator of having to live with the consequences of not succeeding in doing it.
And then I realised something else. In spite of what every self-motivation book tells you, negative motivation is far more effective than positive motivation.
My problem with getting my homework done was that the positive motivation of getting it finished was far too weak to overcome the negative motivation of having to stop playing with my toys or listening to the radio (we didn’t get television until 1953). But what if I had concentrated instead on the negative consequences of not doing it?
Ten years later I found myself in the Army. The Army is renowned for negative motivation. But it certainly produces results. Have a look at this parade from 1962 - I’m somewhere in the back rank of the company receiving the Colour. Negative motivation it may be, but 59 years later being a part of that parade is one of the proudest memories in my life.
Anyway what all this is leading up to is that I’ve been puzzling recently why I’ve never felt entirely happy that I have found the right question for FVP, Simple Scanning and the other methods which use a question.
So looking at the most popular questions:
1. No Question and Standing Out. These come down to identifying what one feels needs doing, based on the premise that our minds are capable of subconsciously identifying the most important factors. This is well and good but I realised that they identify the positive consequences of doing the task, rather than the negative consequences of not doing it.
2. The same applies to such questions as What is the most important thing that I could do now? Something may not seem to be that important to do, but be very important to avoid failing to do.
For want of a nail the shoe was lost.
For want of a shoe the horse was lost.
For want of a horse the rider was lost.
For want of a rider the battle was lost.
For want of a battle the kingdom was lost.
And all for the want of a horseshoe nail.
This sounds just like me, for want of doing my homework and missing Muffin the Mule, having to get up at 6 a.m. and work in the freezing cold in an unheated bedroom.
So the new question I have come up with focuses on the negative consequences of not doing the task, rather than the positive consequences of doing it:
What am I resisting NOT doing? (Note that the question is not What am I resisting, not doing? The comma would change the meaning completely)
This question is the reverse of What am I resisting doing? as it measures my resistance to the negative consequences of failing to do the task, rather than the negative feelings associated with doing the task. And once I’ve experienced how much I am resisting those negative consequences, I will want to do the task rather than avoid it.
So to go back to the little tale about the nail and the horseshoe, the farrier might say to himself “What am I resisting not doing? I’m resisting not getting hold of one more nail because I know that having badly shoed horses can be fatal in a battle and this is going to be a very important battle indeed.” Only he wouldn’t need to say it because the feeling of resistance would say it for him.
There are several additional forms this question can take:
What am I most resisting NOT doing?
This is the form I use as a stand-alone question (i.e. without any list) or with Simple Scanning, The Bounce and suchlike methods.
What am I resisting NOT doing now?
This is similar to the previous question but with an increased emphasis on immediacy.
With FV, FVP and other similar comparison methods, the question is:
What am I resisting NOT doing more than x?
————————
How well does the new question work?
Amazingly well in my experience so far. For one thing it is very time sensitive. Another thing I’ve found is that it gives a very strong “hit”, which means that I can scan very fast if I’m using a list.
In the short time I’ve been using it, it has immensely improved the quality of my life by ensuring that negatives are removed. If you think of all the negatives caused in your life by “not yet getting round to sorting [problem/mess/disorder] out”, you can see what this means. It also has meant that I prepare earlier and better for meetings and such like.
Your mileage may of course vary. But I would be very pleased to have your comments after you’ve tried it out with your favourite system.
Reader Comments (53)
It reminds me of the idea of prioritizing by minimizing the Cost of Delay, which is often used in product development work. It takes the form of "Weighted Shortest Job First" in Agile frameworks such as SAFe.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cost_of_delay
http://www.scaledagileframework.com/wsjf/
I read each item and consider -- what if I don't do this item?
If it screams at me and says "You can't do that!! You MUST do this item!!" -- then this is an example of "resisting not doing".
But if my reaction is "sure, no problem, go ahead and skip" -- then I am not "resisting not doing".
So I should focus on the ones that scream at me and resist when I consider not doing it.
Is that basically what you mean?
This reminds me of one of the precepts in Theory of Constraints -- we humans are much more attuned to pain and problems and conflict, than we are to aspirations and goals and visions. We feel them more tangible and viscerally. Fear is stronger than aspiration. In ToC we make use of that to get to the heart of the matter more quickly and with greater clarity.
<< I'm not sure what it means to "resist not doing", >>
It means "to resist [the negative consequences of] not doing [the task in question].
In other words, instead of scanning for the negative or positive feelings associated with doing a task, scan for the negative feelings associated with the consequences of leaving the task undone.
Example:
Dealing with your email
negative consequences of not dealing with it
missing important messages
leaving people waiting for replies
increasing your reputation for unreliability
having a vast backlog
not reacting quickly to information, requests or problems
etc etc
Do you have any negative feelings about those consequences? Feelings which might cause you to resist getting into that state?
<< I read each item and consider -- what if I don't do this item? >>
Yes, that's basically it, except that actually asking that question of each item is going to result in a very slow scan.
What I envisage, and have practised enough to know that it works, is to do a rapid scan through the list and let the appropriate tasks jump out at me. This happens because the question is aimed at sensing resistance, not at providing an intellectual answer.
In a similar way, if you are asking the question on its own without a list, it's not a matter of thinking through all the possibilites. The answer should jump out at you. Your brain already knows that not answering all your email will result in chaos, or that failing to get your report in in time will result in your glowing reputation being dimmed in the eyes of your colleagues. As a result you will be resisting those consequences, and the question will pick up on that resistance.
I will try.
The phrase you chose is very hard to intuit though. I read "resist not doing" and in the abstract my mind comes up blank. i like Seraphim's explanation if it's right.
<< i like Seraphim's explanation if it's right. >>
I assume you mean Seraphim's question "What if I don't do this item?"
The problem with it is that it is targeted at an intellectual appreciation of the likely consequences of the proposed action. And the answer to the question will be something on the lines of "On considering the balance of probabilities I have come to the conclusion that not doing this is likely to result in an unacceptable result at this moment in time."
Whereas my question is targeted at the feelings of resistance which your brain already has towards the likely negative consequences of not doing it. So if you get a blank when you ask the question about a particular task, that means you're not sensing any resistance, so no need to take any action on that task.
When you fire the question at a task and get a yelp, you know you're on target!
When I went for a walk forty minutes ago, I allowed the question to determine which turnings to take. I eventually came to a junction with three possible directions A, B and C, I asked "What am I resisting not doing?" The answer came back immediately "Take B".
Note what happened here. I didn't need to weigh up the pros and cons. The answer came back without thinking.
Why?
B was the shortest route home, I'd walked far enough already, the temperature was falling and there were a number of things I wanted to do before I went to bed. I didn't need to think those factors through - my mind already knew them perfectly well.
If I did not take B, I would have to walk further in the cold and would either get to bed late or have to leave some of the things I wanted to do.
So I was resisting not taking B. Asking the question immediately picked up this resistance and gave an immediate answer: "Take B". I didn't have to think about it at all. The answer was already there in the feeling of resistance.
Yes, that's how I intended my question, "What if I don't do this item?" To get used to the process, I started asking that question literally, but with the purpose of sensing my natural emotional response to the answer, rather than doing an intellectual analysis.
After a bit of practice, it started to come more naturally, and I could scan quickly through the list, and get a quick emotional response, just as you describe.
It's similar to the "standing out" approach, but I'm scanning for "pain if I leave this item undone" rather than "is this task ready to be done?"
<< scan for the negative feelings associated with the consequences of leaving the task undone >>
Yes, that's what I've been doing for the last couple of hours. It took a bit of getting used to it, but it quickly becomes quite natural and fast.
I agree, it's a useful approach, and has guided me well for the last couple of hours.
I will keep going with it, and report back! Thanks!
<< The problem with it is that it is targeted at an intellectual appreciation of the likely consequences of the proposed action. And the answer to the question will be something on the lines of "On considering the balance of probabilities I have come to the conclusion that not doing this is likely to result in an unacceptable result at this moment in time." >>
Haha! Yes, I could see that approach would not work very well. The point is to get a quick emotional reaction.
I guess I am asking my question more like "How painful would it feel if I left this task undone?"
This resonates more with me than the idea of "resisting the consequences" if I leave the task undone -- but it seems to capture the essence of what you are getting at.
<< Whereas my question is targeted at the feelings of resistance which your brain already has towards the likely negative consequences of not doing it. So if you get a blank when you ask the question about a particular task, that means you're not sensing any resistance, so no need to take any action on that task. >>
I guess I am thrown off a bit by the word "resistance". In the context of time management, "resistance" connotes "avoidance" and "procrastination" and things like that, at least for me. And for me, I don't find myself *resisting* the negative consequences of leaving something undone -- those consequences are simply *invisible*. I have just tended to *ignore* those consequences, until they start to assert themselves in the form of anxiety or worry about a looming task, and then that feeling would inform the "standing out" process (or maybe interfere with it).
But now that you (via this blog post) have brought my attention to those negative consequences, and have framed it like this, I can see that yes, the emotional reaction to those negative consequences is quite strong, when I start paying attention to it. And I like how this works -- it provides a different emotional evaluation of the task than the "standing out" process does -- but it's just as fast, and probably even more useful.
I would guess that ultimately it's this emotional response you are aiming at, not the precise wording, is that right?
<< Do you mean “which would I regret not having done”? >>
Yes, sort of. I would certainly regret having to walk twice as far in the cold and getting to bed late. But that's only half the meaning of my question. The point is that I already have resistance in my mind to getting cold and being late and the question targets that feeling. Result an instant answer, instead of an intellectual inquiry.
<< Yes, that's how I intended my question, "What if I don't do this item?" >>
That's one of the many questions which I tried out before finding the question I'm proposing. I didn't find it anything like as effective, but if it works for you, fine.
Though there is one problem with your question. It has to be used with a list. It can't be used on its own - and I'm finding that an increasingly valuable use of my question.
<< I don't find myself *resisting* the negative consequences of leaving something undone -- those consequences are simply *invisible* >>
Well, that's the whole point of the article. My discovery that - in spite of all you say - we are actually already resisting these things, and all it needs is the question to unmask that fact.
In the reply I gave to Alan just now, taking A or C instead of B would have resulted in my getting cold and going late to bed. I already knew that I didn't want to be cold or get to bed late, and I was naturally resisting them.
The question unmasked the resistance, not the fact that I didn't want to be cold or get to bed late. That was an intellectual analyse performed later as to *why* the question came up with "Take B". I only performed that analysis for the purposes of writing these answers. For the purposes of getting home, I didn't need that analysis - just the answer to the question.
<< I would guess that ultimately it's this emotional response you are aiming at, not the precise wording, is that right? >>
Yes, but I spent literally weeks getting the wording right in order to save all of you the trouble!
<< it immediately brought out very sharp, clear, poignant feelings about the needs (spiritual and earthly) of the people on my list, and encouraged more fervent prayer. I'll have to keep this in mind! >>
That's interesting. Although using the question has greatly affected how I pray, I haven't used it with a list in that sort of way. As you say, it was the original purpose of standing out.
<< One modification that I’m trying now after using it as written for a half dozen or so tasks is “What am I resisting leaving undone?” >>
That's one of the questions I tested out myself, and I didn't find it quite as effective as the question I'm proposing. I think the reason lies in the difference between "not doing" and "leaving undone".
It's quite a subtle difference. But think of the difference between "Don't do that!" and "Leave that undone!" The first is direct, powerful and totally negative. The second is less direct, less powerful and is a mixture of a positive (leave) and a negative (undone).
Nevertheless it did work for me, but not quite so well as the one I eventually came up with.
The question sensed my resistance to a) leaving replies unanswered, b) disappointing my regular commenters, c) letting small tasks pile up, d) having to find time to do it later, e) etc.
I didn't have to spell those things out. The question homed in on the resistance instead.
My only problem is that the question as phrased assumes that the only reason to do things is to avoid pain. It means that we would tend to ignore things that bring us pleasure in the present in favor of things that will only provide payoff further down the line.
For example, one of the items on my FVP list is "Watch Legends of Tomorrow"... Now, there are no consequences to me not doing it, so by this method it will never get selected, until at some point it ends up at the the top of the list.
Or possibly, at some point in time, part of the not resisting will involve the fact that if I do not watch it, I will feel like I am neglecting myself and have a dull life (sounds dramatic, I know, but any consequnceless activity I enjoy in itself can be substituted here), which will mean that it will actually increase its ranking.
I am just thinking things through, and would appreciate anybody's thoughts.
<< My only problem is that the question as phrased assumes that the only reason to do things is to avoid pain. >>
No, the question is not aimed at avoiding pain. The question is aimed at avoiding the negative consequences of not doing something. In the case you quote of watching Legends of Tomorrow, the negative consequence is that you don't get to watch something which you want to watch.
If there were no negative consequences to not watching it, why would it matter to you whether you watch it or not?
Double negation is difficult linguistically, but can actually be a very powerful way of thinking. Jordan Peterson speaks of paying attention to the future ‘hell’ you want to avoid as a long term strategy, but this form of resistance questioning makes that imminent.
<< That phrase seems to represent an implicitly understood concept that approximately means “what do I want not to have not have done” which I’m phrasing such as to emphasize the double negative implicit in the question. >>
That's supposed to be less confusing?
Also I don't understand what you mean by there being a double negative implicit in the question.
- I'm not doing a task (tidying my room)
- I'm resisting the fact that I'm not doing it (because my room is untidy and I don't like it to be untidy)
- So, what am I resisting not doing? Answer: tidying my room
Where's the double negative?
And come to that where's the fear? (unless the Drill Sergeant is coming to inspect - in which case be very afraid)
Theory of Constraints talks about a "change matrix" -- four forces that come into play when considering any change:
1. Positive consequences of making the change. These are the things that the change will cause to exist -- the things I don't have now, but do want. This is where "standing out" tends to focus.
2. Negative consequences of making the change. These are the things I don't have and also don't want. This is the main source of "resistance to change", and I also suspect the main source of procrastination.
3. Positive consequences of NOT making the change: Do have, do want. This is the force of inertia.
4. Negative consequences of NOT making the change: Do have, don't want. This is the cost of living with the current situation, the cost of delay. This is where Mark's current question is directed.
http://www.dbrmfg.co.nz/Advanced%20Efrat's%20Cloud%20&%20The%20Matrix.htm#:~:text=Now%20let's%20bring%20in%20the%20change%20matrix
Mark's comments in ||
|| That's supposed to be less confusing?
No, it's making explicit my confusion.
|| Also I don't understand you mean by there being a double negative implicit in the question.
|| - I'm not doing a task (tidying my room)
|| - I'm resisting the fact that I'm not doing it (because my room is untidy and I don't like it to be untidy)
||- So, what am I resisting not doing? Answer: tidying my room
|| Where's the double negative?
Let me explain: What is Resistance? It is a motivating feeling and action of NOT wanting something. So you resist not tidying your room = (approximately) you do not want to not tidy your room.
That is the double negative. But don't take it as a bad thing. In this context once you grasp the meaning of "resisting not doing", the concept seems to be readily handled by the unconscious to powerfully cut through to what matters.
|| And come to that where's the fear? (unless the Drill Sergeant is coming to inspect - in which case be very afraid)
The fear in such an example is extremely subtle. You fear (very slightly) that future you will experience discomfort (or not experience pleasure) the next time you visit the room. Maybe you don't call that fear. That's fine, I don't care about the word; this is what I mean.
<< I spent literally weeks getting the wording right in order to save all of you the trouble! >>
I am finding the concept very helpful. But I still can't get my mind to resonate with the wording, "What am I resisting not doing?"
I'll keep playing with it. :-)
If you can resist doing something, surely you can resist not doing something?
I'm resisting tidying my room because it's too much trouble
I'm resisting not tidying my room because I keep losing stuff and it looks horrid
An example for those struggling with it:
I have "brush my teeth" on my list. I'm really resisting NOT doing it because otherwise my teeth might start to rot.
I wonder whether it would work better for me to think of this in a kind of "KonMarie" style, going through and imagining not doing a thing, and then feel for what "sparks fear" when I look at that item and see its "not doneness" rather than asking the question directly. It feels more alive to focus and get in tune with those subtle fears that drive resistance.
Definitely an interesting exercise! It's going to be interesting putting this into practice, and I'll probably be doing this with a 5/2 no list system, which is still working well for me.
<< when I look at that item and see its "not doneness">>
Yes, that's the key. To see what it's going to look like (or in some cases will continue to look like) if you don't do it.
The whole idea is to transfer one's attention away from how much effort it's going to be to do the task to what it's going to be like if you don't do it.
Nat gives a good example above with cleaning teeth.
I gave an example in the article of failing to do my homework as a child.
I hope using it with 5/2 goes well. Funnily enough I hadn't thought of using it with that.
Interesting question you ask. It reminded me of the Resistance Principle you discussed in Get Everything Done (Chapter 11 pp 147 onwards) and specifically pp152 where you state there are two ways of getting rid of resistance. they are
1. do what we are resisting, OR
2. make a conscious decision not to do it.
I think there is a third way which is to reduce resistance and all of your systems try to do this by creating rules, encouraging flow and momentum (that is my view anyway, you may disagree!)
I also think that the question you ask is easier to understand taking into account 1 and 2 above.
I too I had some difficulty getting the question into my head but I found the above helps as does the variant "What am I resisting doing now?". This works with no list or a list very well and is quick. I don't need to go into detail on why I am resisting each task I have. I quickly just know... a deadline looming, a promise I made to someone, an action as part of getting fitter, tidier etc.
The original wording was a non-starter for me, as others are reporting, but I am beginning to grasp it with the DON'T method. Once grasped, I can see how the original wording could be effective.
If I scan an item and consider it never being done, and I don't register any resistance at all, but only register "don't care", then it's really easy to delete that item. Negative consequences from deleting the item just don't register.
Using "standing out" (or "standing out for deletion"), I find those items hang around longer. There is some pleasantness about the idea, and that attraction allows it to hang on.
This seems to indicate the task does represent some opportunity, but the value of that opportunity is so small, it's better to just delete it. There are always plenty of other opportunities with much higher value that really resist being deleted.
Hm, that gives me an idea. How will the task respond if I just consider deleting it? Does it resist being deleted? Which tasks resist deletion most strongly?
"What resists being deleted?"
"What most resists being deleted?"
I'll give it a try.
<< An extra benefit of this approach is it helps clean out lingering items. >>
I would counsel against trying to do too many things at once with the Question. Especially when you haven't used it enough to find out how it really works. I am finding more and more that it not only is brilliant at selecting stuff, it is also brilliant at selecting it at precisely the right time.
For instance this afternoon I had a Zoom call with the Council of a charity which I will become President of in a few months time and I had a number of papers to get ready for the call. I then had a couple of telephone calls which I had to take fast action on, and which considerably reduced the time I had set aside for preparing for the call. I just let the Question take over and everything fitted beautifully into the time available, and my presentation to the Council went extremely well.
Following on Seraphim's comment: As it happens I'm evolving a system that builds and finishes off a list of tasks each day, which gives a sense of closure that I accomplished everything I wanted to. Adapting this question, I'm asking at times, "what am I resisting not doing today?" Those items I act on. As the day approaches its conclusion, Items that I dismiss items that I'm not resistant to abandoning for today.
I would tend to agree!
I actually wasn't trying to do anything different. I was just using "the Question" in the usual way, and discovered this in the natural course of things.
I was going through some of my older Serial No-List pages. I had gone through these same pages a few times over the last week, using "standing out". Nothing had stood out, and neither did anything feel like it should be deleted.
But using "the Question" -- Bernie's version -- I found there was no resistance at all to not doing some of these tasks. It seemed there would be no negative consequences at all, by skipping the task. At first I just left the tasks there. But then I started to delete them when I got this feeling.
It was only afterward that I did any reflecting on its effectiveness in pruning these low-value tasks.
<< I'm evolving a system that builds and finishes off a list of tasks each day >>
That sounds great. One of the advantages of this question is that as long as one keeps the "what am I resisting not doing" bit, it can easily be adapted to a whole variety of systems or none. The longer I use this question the more I find what it is capable of.
No, I don't think I have ever tried "If I only can only do one more thing..?", though it's sort of similar to 5/2 where you have five tasks, no more, no less to start with.
I think it could be a very effective question, but it's quite different from "What am I resisting not doing?" in that it's inviting you to consider the positive effects of what you might do, rather than the negative consequences of not doing something which ought to be done.
I think whether the "only one thing" question is more positive versus negative in it's questioning depends more on your personality. I think I was already leaning towards the "what am I resisting NOT doing?" question in my 5/2 list before you posted, as I would often be asking myself, what I couldn't bear to leave undone. In other words, if I could only do 5 things, if you're highly enthusiastic (as a personality trait) then it seems like you might have a tendency to emphasize the things with the highest positive association, but if you don't have that push to be enthusiastic about the future, then you might find more drive in selecting those 5 "only's" on the basis of what you fear not doing more than what you desire to do.
"No, I don't think I have ever tried "If I only can only do one more thing..?", though it's sort of similar to 5/2 where you have five tasks, no more, no less to start with.
I think it could be a very effective question, but it's quite different from "What am I resisting not doing?" in that it's inviting you to consider the positive effects of what you might do, rather than the negative consequences of not doing something which ought to be done."
For me the questions contains both, positive as well as negative effects... It contains also the element of "what has the most negative impact if I don't do it now".
I don't find this phrasing intuitive or easy to understand. But if I get the point you're making, I might try as question: What do I most want to avoid?
On a related note, I sometimes tell my teenage son when he says he doesn't want or like to do something, that for things I don't like to do, I like not having done them even less...
You are by far not alone with difficulty with the phrasing. In part because it expresses a concept we don't often think about. Feeling opposed to procrastinating. "What do I most want to avoid" does not seem like the same thing. First, "most" isn't part of Mark's question. "What do I want to avoid" is still different, unless by WHAT you mean "WHAT future undesirable outcome resulting from not acting". Some how I doubt that's what you had in mind.
It takes some work to really internalize the concept, but I think reading Bernie above will be most helpful.
But to take it one step further, once you get the concept, don't think about this at all, but try to simply intuit whether not-doing is a bad idea, because your body resists that idea.
Just to let you know. Is there a typo in this bit of the post?
"What am I resisting doing now? This is similar to the previous question but with an increased emphasis on immediacy."
Otherwise, I'm confused as it seems to shift the emphasis back on to what we are resisting doing rather than not doing.
Thanks
Matt
Thank you, and well spotted! I don't know how many times I've read through this post - and other people too - without anyone picking it up until now.
I've amended it.
It's only because I was trying out the variations and happened to write it down.
It's a huge hurdle for me to get the idea of “good resistance”. In the context of time management, I've always looked as resistance as "the enemy" (as in Preston's 𝘞𝘢𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘈𝘳𝘵).